The word "should" can be incredibly dangerous.
There's a lot of serious emotions attached to that word. There's a lot of major suffering that comes along with that word. Pain. Grief. Expectation. The works.
That word can do a significant amount of damage to your life and keep you utterly stuck in the past.
Maybe you've heard yourself utter the words before...
"This should have gone down in a very different way."
But the truth is, it didn't. It didn't go that way.
When you live in the world of "should" you aren't actually living in the present moment. You are living in the past or the future.
When the "should" you have exists in the past, you aren't able to come to terms with what happened because you want it to go a different way entirely. You can't accept the facts and you keep on thinking that it should have gone a completely different way. You see how dangerous this is?
So what's the skill to learn here? Come back to the present moment over and over again.
When your "should" is existing in the future, you are projecting what "needs" to happen onto a time and place that you can't actually see. You are essentially diving into the unknown and out of fear (typically) wanting certain situations to go certain ways. What happens if they don't? You end up being incredibly disappointed in the current events.
You have to keep coming back to the present moment.
Truth is, we are all going to go through incredibly painful times in our lives. There will be moments that challenge us, make us want to fall to our knees in tears and make us crack under pressure.
Darkness in our lives will always be present.
But what makes us suffer endlessly is not accepting the truth.
So...you have to view it this way. What happened happened...and it couldn't have happened in any other way.
And what happens when you let go of your past and your future and come back to the present moment?
You get to live in the present. You get to live in knowing that life is going to take care of you no matter what happens.
No "should."
No past...because you've come to terms with it.
No future...because you're in the moment.
You're living "here."
So stay connected with the present moment.
Live in a world of acceptance.
There's a lot of serious emotions attached to that word. There's a lot of major suffering that comes along with that word. Pain. Grief. Expectation. The works.
That word can do a significant amount of damage to your life and keep you utterly stuck in the past.
Maybe you've heard yourself utter the words before...
"This should have gone down in a very different way."
But the truth is, it didn't. It didn't go that way.
When you live in the world of "should" you aren't actually living in the present moment. You are living in the past or the future.
When the "should" you have exists in the past, you aren't able to come to terms with what happened because you want it to go a different way entirely. You can't accept the facts and you keep on thinking that it should have gone a completely different way. You see how dangerous this is?
So what's the skill to learn here? Come back to the present moment over and over again.
When your "should" is existing in the future, you are projecting what "needs" to happen onto a time and place that you can't actually see. You are essentially diving into the unknown and out of fear (typically) wanting certain situations to go certain ways. What happens if they don't? You end up being incredibly disappointed in the current events.
You have to keep coming back to the present moment.
Truth is, we are all going to go through incredibly painful times in our lives. There will be moments that challenge us, make us want to fall to our knees in tears and make us crack under pressure.
Darkness in our lives will always be present.
But what makes us suffer endlessly is not accepting the truth.
So...you have to view it this way. What happened happened...and it couldn't have happened in any other way.
And what happens when you let go of your past and your future and come back to the present moment?
You get to live in the present. You get to live in knowing that life is going to take care of you no matter what happens.
No "should."
No past...because you've come to terms with it.
No future...because you're in the moment.
You're living "here."
So stay connected with the present moment.
Live in a world of acceptance.
About the Author:
Evan Sanders is a professional life coach at AYKME coaching. Dive into these great Bible Verses About Faith http://thewordsofencouragement.com/bible-verses-about-faith/ or these Quotes On Hope http://thewordsofencouragement.com/quotes-on-hope/ to get some motivation to move forward!